The Adventure of Tim


After that, he proceeds to burn the donut shops, and blame any other guy around, who is also burning to ashes.
But before, he steals a couple of donuts.


Alrighty then.

Tim starts humming “Back to the USSR” in a Russian accent while being all too happy cleaning up a dead person with a broom and murdering more people by blowing up the donut shop. A man walks up to him in a black suit and fedora and speak a to him.

Suspicious Man: Something in Russian or whatever, Tim doesn’t know.

Tim proceeds to blame on this potential operative, who the surviving cops immediately arrest because they’re Sooooooo 1950’s. Tim gets out, but not before the chief of the investigation who used the power of donuts to get there sees him covered in very suspicious amounts of dust.

Your Goal (!WARNING! This will be tough.): Convince the investigator you’re innocent.


He powerfully charmspeaks him into thinking that he was attacked by an army of idiotic unintilligent 7 year olds that had decided to gang up on him by chucking bags of dust bunnies onto his body, nonetheless he did nothing and just went with it.

Note: if tims plan doesnt work, and he gets arrested, i demand that tim chuck a bag of donut cakes at the chief in order to bribe him into letting him go


Welp I don’t want this to be really formal and serious.
So, to convince the investigator you’re innocent, a good technique would be to contrast you with any other guy that seems suspecious, and manipulating them into saying some thing that could get them to be blamed.


Alright, here’s what happened.

Tim is super smart and not average, so he tells the investigator that the suspicious Russian dude over there is actually 3 children stacked on top of each other, and he was assaulted by dust bunnies; then, he uses the dust to convince the officer that the reason he ran so fast was because they tried suffocate Tim with dust. Tim knows he made a MASTER PLAY! and is let go.

But. shock, horror! The investigator notices some powder that doesn’t look like dust but powdered sugar! Tim didn’t know it would happen, and he now needs to keep his alibi and make an excuse for the donut sugar. Mind you, the investigator was in the donut shop all day, so powder so fresh couldn’t have been from bought donuts.


Tim loves sugar so he decided to get a bag and pour it over his head


Pouring sugar on himself is part of his religion


The answer is not clear! I’m blind!


Alright, let’s go.

Tim explains to the investigator that he’s sugish, a religion that demands he pour sugar on himself of sugar days, which he explains are all days. The investigator expects it to be a lie, but Tim mentions how it would be discriminatory to arrest him for his beliefs due to the first amendment. The investigator is about to rebut, but Tim slips him a small cup of sprite cranberry as a “religious” gift and very specifically NOT A BRIBE, AT ALL, TOTALLY. the investigator lets it slide and gives team permission to leave the crime scene while the Russian guy is yelling stuff in Russian, or he could be from Crimea, but that’s also Russia.

Question: What does Tim do next?


Gets a stray dog army that for some reason also speak russian :v


He brings his army of stray russian dogs with him to the next room, parking them outside the door


Alright, let’s go.

Tim decides he needs some protective dogs and goes to look for some. Fortunately, he runs into some dogs eating bear with bearskin hats, and they decide to join him.

Question: What does Tim do now?


This is just perfect.

Tim trains all of them with a magic flute, to try making a heist to the white house.


They train them by chucking a bone at all of them and decide to go and rob a bank by chucking bones at the people


That works too lol


Alright, sorry to keep you all waiting.

So Tim decided “You know what’s a good idea, robbing the president.” Before he can walk into the whitehouse, tons of FBI and secret service agents surround Tim and the Com Dogs because they knew this was going to happen, because the government always knows.

While this whole debacle is occurring, who should arrive but VLADIMIR PUTIN, RULER OF RUSSIA AND SLAYER OF BEARS! to save Tim. Tim’s pretty happy with this plan, and Vladimir Putin gets Tim in his CommuCopter (Trademarked) and try to fly away. Unfortunately, they’re pursued by CapiCopters

Question: What does Tim do?


Tim chucks a bone at one of the capicopters, only to discover that his dogs can fly


He is also the Bear rider lol.

Anyways, he sends his dogs to the CapiCopters, and so, the dogs manage to fly them.


Tim grabs the radio on the CommuCopter (Trademarked) and calls in the FLYING BEARS.